Beautiful Soul

before the beginning,

i was half past smitten,

felt like a child,

u made me smile,

in ur presence was worth the while,

unknowingly but willingly...

intrigued and infatuated,

i wanted IN on ur mind

and 1st dibs on unraveling ur soul.


Rough,

Mysterious,

Exterior.

-I felt inferior-

But boyyy u make my fuckin heart smile

ask me...

Go ahead!

ask me!

i promise ill tell each time...

pardon me if I turn and smile,

but ur eyes,

they SCREAM at me!

im shy

im insecure

but i wanted/want to enter ur beautiful twisted soul.

U.still.MAKE.MY.HEART.SMILE

I Am A Masochist

I wanna stay here,
I want to hold on,
In this spot as if my feet were stuck in mud
Staring into the light,
My shoulder slightly angled,
I know I should a bow face and continue head on.
Where am I headed?
Not too sure, but I hope its away from this awkward pain I feel
The one that kinda makes me feel I'm in love with..u
or...yea,
I think its somewhere there.


Its the one that makes me subconsciously hope that when the seasons change ull pick up that phone and call me,
Call me and say: Boo I missed u, and I do care.

I harbor every memory,
Its fuel for my strongest hopes and deepest dreams...yes I am a PISCES.

Cynically, it haunts me
It keeps me @ a stand still, when I should be flying my pretty wings,
Flying towards the nexx big thing.

BUT, in the mean time this flight is on standby.

I'll continue to reminisce,
And remember every lil insignificant thing u said or did...
Until the thought of u spreads throughout my whole brain, like metastasis

Controlling my every thought and emotion.
The end result is... completely distraught.


By the 3rd day, ill be good again, cuz good 'ol time comes and eases my pain.

So until nexx time u re- enter my mind again "friend".

I am a masochist.

Where im From Suckaaas

I'm from New York (the richest city in the world, and hopefully it stays like that!)

yea sooo ...im genetically inclined to dislike every place else =p

i LOVE

I LOVE

i love

& i LOVE

i care, i care, and i care

& in btwn a little despair

but in thee end i LOVE, i LOVE and i care...

I never appear to be brilliant or pretend to be a genius

I'm a smart and clever GAL that could teach u a thing or two ; )

Something I Read...and believe hehehehe

There's Power In Being a Pisces. Seen and Unseen.

Something Life taught me...

U can't be truly happy for someone if ur not happy with urself, however some ppl just don't wanna see u happy (friends included)

I KNOW EVERY WORD TO THIS MOVIE. 'NUFF SAID

SOMETHING I'VE LEARNED...


"REMEMBER! BEEEEE YOURSELF!"-GENIE

i should be doing HOMEWORK but...


i realized that i live in constant fear...
of my own abilities
afraid to fail, but yet im so capable...
the fuckery
iLove HARD
iHurt even worse
...my ♥ and soul should be riding shotgun in a hearse.

ive known all along that im sweet
sometimes shy
sarcastic and can be RUDE as hell
& i love it all
im insecure
im insecure
o and im insecure
i can give give and give
ill get nothing or less than i deserve

ive learned that i seek other ppl's approval
at a degree where it need not be
the ppl u love the most
will hurt u the most
ull probably never understand the things they do
but the love i have for them is way past unconditional
...our time together is our time together, and our time apart, is our time apart*
& they say if u pray, then u can get ur blessings ordered and delivered*

can u call me please?
can we fix this please?
that's all i ask
what comes next? well, we'll just take it from there.
can...we...just




please .

• Have u ever wanted to know something so bad, but when u got what u were looking for u wished u never did?
• wished that ur eyes neva read those words?

...cuz now those same words u glimpsed at for a moment or two, haunts u every now and again.

every time they res-surface u shake ur head, sigh or even turn away as if that makes it go away...
i think those words bother me the most cuz i know they were true.

the fact that people do not know the difference btwn TO AND TOO BOTHERS me.
END OF STORY.